I had someone recently ask me if MK knows she is adopted. She was serious and genuinely wanted to know how we talk to MK and Maddox about their adoptions. Her daughter is in kindergarten with MK. And the answer is, yes, MK and Maddox know they are adopted. They know they were born in China. They know we came to get them, all of us. They know they had foster mothers/families. How much of their adoptions they understand, I question. And how much they want to really discuss, I question. Especially with one - anything that singles her out, be it facts or fans, she shies away from. So that brings me to my recent thoughts.....MK is 6 and Maddox is 3. The fact that they are Chinese by birth will never change. Yet, they are being raised in a southern American family in a culture far different from what they knew as infants. So I wonder, how much will they (and do they) want their heritage to play in their lives as they grow? We have always said we will let them take the lead and we will follow them when it comes to their interest in China. Yet, it is sometimes tough to know whether that approach is the best to take.....we would never, ever want them to be embarrassed or feel as though being Chinese American is a bad thing.....so, all this to say, just as our adoption journey takes twists and turns along the way, our path guiding our girls as they grow tends to follow the same map. As MK ages, I just know she has to be sensitive when adults whisper questions or say "oriental" or ask her if her siblings are real....she is 6. She doesn't grasp any of that enough to understand and give grace to their ignorance. ***babbling in my mind can get the best of my typing abilities....I am all over the place probably because at the end of the day, I want to parent right, no mess ups.
Onto another thought.....homeschooling. My mental picture this week for homeschooling was one morning as I ran around scrambling to get Valentines made and laundry washed/dried, Pryce came to me and asked if he could take a break from his work and play with Maddox. I said yes. He proceeded to take Maddox into our garage to ride her bike. Then he had an idea and before I knew it, his imagination took over and a train was made out of random riding toys in our garage....all this, with his sister and her baby doll. The ten minutes that I had agreed to for playtime grew into thirty minutes simply because I was enjoying their laughter.....it is the moments like these that I stop and thank God and Ryan for opening up our minds to homeschooling.
And lastly, MK. She will finish up her Kindergarten year in May. In June, she will begin her first grade year at home with us. She loves school. I asked her if she thought she was going to miss it next year and she said, "Yes. Well, no, not really. But I will miss Mrs. Duncan." Sigh. She is just like her mother, hates to say goodbye, especially when it is to someone extra special.
